Before Avatar leaves Netflix, I'm trying to get all my friends to watch it. It's not just a kids show, I tell them. It's really, really good. Actually, it's almost perfect.
Almost.
This show has amazing worldbuilding. It's funny, it's sweet. And Zuko's character arc is probably the best arc ever. But there's one area where the writers dropped the ball. One place where the story really gets something wrong, and it pains me so much, because this show got nearly everything else right.
So which is the part that rankles me? The part that leaves such a bad taste in my mouth?
Aang and Katara's relationship.
I'm not going to say that I dislike Aang and Katara together, just that I really think the creators did her character a disservice in how they represented her feelings. I think it's amazing that they allowed Katara to explore her romantic feelings with Jet so early on in the show. Young women are often portrayed as sexless, and the ones who are interested are often shown to be sluts, or at least have the male characters around them demean and disrespect them for it (I'm looking at you, Ronald Weasley), that I found it entirely refreshing and important in the way the show portrayed Katara's crush (and how the other characters treated her about it.)
But there was next to nothing to indicate Katara's interest in Aang. She didn't seem all that excited about it when the plot forced a kiss on the pair in "The Cave of Two Lovers," episode, and I'm going to interpret her blush after he kissed her in the "Day of the Black Sun," episode as an expression of surprised. And it's not a good look of surprise, like "OMG! I never thought this would happen and I'm so happy!" It's clearly a "Ohh, I'm not sure about this," expression. I mean, look at her body language. She doesn't lean in. Her lips aren't moving. Her hands don't reach for him, take him into an embrace. Nothing. When she blushes, she looks away, wide-eyed and worried.
And then, we get the kiss in the "Emerald Island Players," episode (a great and hilarious episode, for sure.) But let's get one thing straight. Before Aang kisses Katara in this scene, she tells him she doesn't know how she feels about him and that she's confused. He then leans in for a smooch and she actively pulls away and rightfully admonishes him. "I just said I was confused!" she tells him. Her voice is raised. She's upset, she clearly didn't appreciate this.
Aang, of course, is at a total loss. He loves Katara, so she should love him back? Isn't that how it always works? If your the hero of the story, it sure is. But that's not the way it works in life. And for a show that go so much else right about big, hard, adult topics like war and genocide and racism, I'm really, really upset that just gloss over consent like this.
And yes, I'm talking about consent. I know it's just a kiss. Not sex. And I know they're just children, but this is where it starts: the harmful ideas that when boys are mean to girls, it means they like them. That if a guy keeps trying, for long enough, she'll eventually come around. No doesn't really mean no, after all. And when boys start learning this at a young age, well, we're only just beginning to talk about the consequences.
I don't recall Aang ever apologizing. I don't think he ever admits that he was wrong or made amends with Katara. The show doesn't even acknowledge that the little avatar overstepped any boundaries. The lesson it eschews, rather, is that if you kiss the girl you like for long enough, she'll eventually fall in love with you.
After all, boys will be boys. Especially if they keep consuming media that teaches them lessons like this.
But I think we can do better. Heck, even Avatar did better. Remember when Zuko realized Katara was upset with him? When he apologized, made it up to her, worked hard to earn her respect? And he then treated her like an equal. Asking for her help in the finale. He trusted her and fought with her like an equal.
I'm not saying I think Zuko and Katara are the best couple. And I'm not saying Aang and Katara are necessarily a bad couple. I just wish Katara had been given more agency and made a choice based on something other than how much the writes (and presumably the audience) liked Aang and/or wanted them to be together.
Actually, just kidding. #Zutaraforever.
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