When I teach workshops on creative writing, I try to reference stories most of my students will be familiar with. . . Star Wars. . . Batman. . . . Harry Potter. . . Any of the big IPs most people will know, even if they haven't seen it. But many of my students want to write for animation or comic books, and they often bring up characters and stories I'm not familiar with.
I know I can't possibly know everything about every story ever (though that won't stop me from trying), but when something is brought up again and again, I try to check it out.
The first show I kept hearing about what Avatar the Last Airbender, and I was so glad I finally watched it when I finally did. That show is perfect, nearly, and you can read more about my thoughts on it here. Another show I kept hearing about was Fullmetal Alchemist. It took me longer to get around to watching this one, and longer still to get into it, but boy, when I did, I was all in.
As soon as I finished Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, I immediately went back and started watching again. And again.
I'll be honest—I didn't like all of Fullmetal as much as I like Avatar. When I go back to rewatch, I skip over certain sections of the show. But there was one scene I keep going back to. Sequence really, it stretches over about two episodes, and I've watched it at least a dozen times.
And that sequence is Mustang's fight with Lust. This section is a masterclass in writing, I swear. Nearly every element of it is perfect. I'd actually argue that every element of it is perfect. I can't find anything to fault. And I've tried.
With that being said, let's dive into what makes this fight sequence so damn good.
The first rule about writing fights scenes is: don't talk about. . . I kid. The first rule about writing fight scenes is the same as writing any other scene: it should move the story forward. Fight scenes need to reveal important information about the story's characters – what they want, value, fear, etc. Information about the story's plot – what's going on, why it matters, how it relates to what happened before, how it sets up what's going to happen next. Fight scenes should also relate to the story's world. The location, the props, every element of the setting should tie back to the story in some way. And finally, fights scenes should also be connected to the story's theme by highlighting or emphasizing the main ideas or values at work in a piece.
Remember, if you can delete a scene without losing any necessary information in your story, you should always do so. And this extends to fight scenes as well. If your scene is just a bit of exciting action to keep things interesting but doesn't add to your story, go back and rewrite it so it does (or maybe send it to Michael Bay, he seems to like them).
The confrontation between Mustang and Lust does all of this extremely well. So let's breakdown why.
This fight scene stretches over two episodes. We'll begin at the end of episode 18, "The Arrogant Palm of a Small Human." This episode sets up a lot of the main action and ends on a great cliffhanger. If you're not familiar with Fullmetal Alchemist, the story really picks up when Captain Maes Hughes is murdered while investigating corruption in the military. His good friend, Colonel Roy Mustang, is doing everything he can to solve the case. . . and it may have been too much. We weren't really sure if Mustang was one of the good guys (Think Snape from Harry Potter). But he's just proven himself to be on the side of our young heroes, and his team getting close to finding the source of the corruption that killed Hughes.
Too close, it seems, because the team is attacked by their enemies. First, Barry and Falman are attacked, but the ever-reliable Riza Hawkeye is able to save them. While the commotion goes down, Mustang is listening in to check on his crew. The banter starts playfully. Roy purrs, pretending he's talking to a girlfriend, while Riza reports and somehow manages to not let her eyes roll out of her head as she takes down Barry and Falman's attacker.
But then. . .
Riza Hawkeye's proven time and again that she's an extremely capable fighter. We know that she can not only take care of herself, but those around her. We've just seen her save her friends by easily taking down their opponent. So we're not worried about her. Not at first. But then, the monster that comes after her shows he's impervious to her bullets. She shoots him. He gets right back up.
She's worried. We're worried. And, of course, Roy Mustang is worried. And this is where the episode ends. It's a great cliffhanger that ensures we're immediately jumping into the next episode to see what happens. Is Riza going to be okay? What is Mustang going to do?
Episode 19, "Death of the Undying," picks up right where 18 left off. We hear the sound of gunshots. We're with Mustang, on the other end of the line, terrified about what's happening to his team.
Especially to Riza (whom he calls Elizabeth here—think of it like a code name). We know this is really serious because of how capable she is, so if she's been taken out, we've got a formidable foe. Also, the flash to Hughes' dead body helps visually communicate where Mustang is coming from. He doesn't want to lose another friend or ally, and this is shown efficiently here.
(and also maybe because Mustang is in love with her? :)
There is a lot of great story work in this next bit. Roy is our hero in this story thread, but instead of him just rushing in and saving the day, first we see Riza's dog Hayate come in to assist her. I love this because, well, one, I love dogs, but also, it's a slow escalation. It keeps us hooked and it keeps the story interesting because things are developing slowly. The action is building. The tension is rising. The audience is on the edge of their seats. Every time things get just a little bit better, when it seems like there's hope, they then get worse. . . .
This is good writing. Always keep things moving, but don't repeat yourself. Things need to change and alternate between getting better and then getting worse. And remember things always get worse before they get better. This episode of Fullmetal does this so well.
We worry about Riza. We think Hayate might save her. But he doesn't and we worry again. This alternating pattern of building and releasing tension is great. It keeps us on the edge of our seats.
So what happens next? Does Mustang finally come in and save her?
Not yet. Instead, Furey comes running in and throws her a weapon. As a team, they take aim and attack the monster again. I love this moment because it shows what a strong, dedicated, and capable team they all are. They are actually good at their jobs. They have each others' back. They're good together. Furey gets relatively little screen time in this show, but I love the moments he gets to shine here. I also love that he's the communications officer, but he knows how to handle himself in combat—as I imagine is true in life. These great character moments are what make this scene/ sequence so spectacular to me. It's not really about the action. It's about the characters. They all get moments to shine.
Time to get back to the action. We've gotten a brief moment to wonder if out team will be okay. Riza and Furey are great together. They're not facing any ordinary monster. These bullets don't stop the beast either. And Hawkeye and Furey are out of bullets. It's time to start worrying again.
I think this is great writing because of how the action escalates. Things keep ratcheting up. And after a moment of tension, there's a moment of relief. This keeps the audience on the edge of their seats without boring or tiring them.
And just when it seems like things can't get any worse, and our heroes have run out of options. . .
Mustang shows up. And saves the day. Because, of course he does, he is the hero here. I just love the moments our supporting cast had to shine before this.
So what happens now that the bad guy has been defeated? The action is over, the tension and worry gone, so it's time to segue into something new. Always got to keep the audience interested.
Instead of being appreciative, Riza scolds Mustang. This works because it's unexpected (we expect the damsel to thank the hero who just saved her, not admonish him). The unexpected is usually funny. It's also in character (who doesn't love it when Riza puts Mustang in place?)
And Fuery and Hayate get a cute moment here. It seems they love it when Riza puts Mustang in his place too :)
But the fight isn't over just because one enemy is down. After a brief pause in the action, Barry and Havoc call their attention and continue to pursue the monster that first attacked them.
Join me for more analysis in part two!
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