If we think of this fight sequence as a complete story, we've reached the "Dark Night of the Soul," moment. Things have gotten as dark as they can get. Mustang and Havoc are down, presumably left for dead, and now the story shifts back to Barry, Alphonse and Riza.
There's some brief (but important) set up for a future conflict for Alphonse. (This isn't important to the fight at hand, but it's important to the larger story, and remember these rules for good writing: set up, pay off and always do at least two things at once. Basically, Alphonse lost his body and his soul now lives in a suit of armor. Barry's soul was also removed from his body and it too now lives in a suit of armor. Barry's body is occupied by some wild animal and has gone feral. Now that they've tracked it down (remember, that's what they were chasing into this lab to begin with), they've realized that the body is decaying. It can't last without its real soul. Now, Alphonse is afraid he might not ever be able to get his body back either. This is good set up for future conflict for Alphonse, and it's tying together the main thread of this story with is all about the Elric brothers getting their bodies back.)
Lust comes in and comments that she's sad to see Alphonse here, especially since she already had to kill one candidate tonight.
"A candidate, a second one?" Alphonse asks. He doesn't know what this means. (We don't either, so we appreciate his asking.)
"Yeah," Lust smirks, "You and Mr. Gallantry."
This is such good writing, guys. Remember, good writing does more than one thing at once! We just learned important exposition that our characters need in this scene and we're setting up future conflict!
Lust quickly takes care of Barry. (He's not important to the plot anymore, so he's dispatched pretty quickly.) She now taunts Riza, who realizes Lust must have killed Mustang. This moment is especially poignant. Riza is a serious soldier. She never loses composure. Her emotions are always under control. But now that she thinks Mustang is dead, we get this:
"You bitch!" She screams, tears pouring down her face. If we, the audience, aren't worried about Mustang, we're worried for her, seeing how much he meant to her. (Remember, emotions don't just come from how much we care about a character, they come from what the characters mean to each other. The moment when Tom Hank's character loses Wilson in Castaway always gets me. It's not about Wilson dying (because he can't, he's a volleyball), it's about what Hanks is losing.)
Riza unloads three guns into Lust and it doesn't nothing to stop her, and Riza, who's shown hardly any emotion in the entire show, is distraught. She sobs openly. It's hard to watch, she's so devastated. Believing Mustang is dead and with no more bullets left to fight, she sinks to her knees and gives in.
Alphonse can't watch her surrender. He claps his hand together and produces a weapon (he can do alchemy). This is new important story beat. The plot hasn't really moved forward in a while. We've just been dealing with the fall out of Mustang's death. Lust didn't know Alphonse could do alchemy before. Now that she knows this, he's another "candidate."
Riza tells Alphonse to run, to save himself, but he refuses. The music swell as Alphonse stands before her. (Remember, Alphonse is a suit of armor). He's getting his moment to shine. This is an important character moment for him, and also, an important plot point.
Again, one of the great things about this whole sequence is how it lets so many of his character shine. Riza did in the beginning, so did Furey. . . Now, Alphonse gets his moment. It's great, he gives a lovely speech, saying he refuses "to stand by and watch another one of his friends get killed. Not when there's something he could do to protect them!"
Lust's long metal claws come out and she slices Alphonse. Pieces of his metal armor fly.
This shows us just how much of a threat Lust is. But we already know this, she's already taken down Havoc and Mustang and Barry . . .
But Alphonse, as aware of this danger as we are, takes a warrior's stance doesn't back down.
And then . . .
Mustang strides in.
Well, it might be more of a stumble, because he is badly injured, but the heroic swashbuckling is there, nonetheless. His fingers flash with fire, his voice drips with anger.
He tells Alphonse he couldn't agree more, and we're all rooting for him. Riza perks up, and Alphonse see's Mustang's fury and conjures a stone wall to protect himself and Riza as Mustang blasts Lust to pieces.
He sends stream after stream of blazing fire at her. She chars, crumples, and regenerates.
"Looks like I can get you on your knees after all," he quips. Comedic callbacks always work nicely. also, this shows us the power he has over her now. He's got the upper hand. It's obvious.
No matter how quickly Lust tries to heal herself, Mustang's ongoing attack is quicker. She screams, it's pretty brutal, but the music swell, framing Mustang's actions as heroic. (His assault has also been set up pretty well as heroic. We've seen Lust and her allies do some pretty horrible stuff.)
We learn that Mustang had to carve a transmutation circle into this own hand (because he's a badass), and that he had to sear his own would closed so he didn't die (because he's a real badass).
Lust tries to regenerate herself, keeps throwing herself at Mustang. Bus she's no match. In a final push, her long, metal claws rush towards him, but he doesn't back down. Unflinching, he unleashes another wave of fire towards her, and it's finally the end. She admits defeat and crumbles to dust.
But she's got to get one last dig in before she dies. promising that one day Mustang's eyes will be wide with agony. "It's coming," she says, "it's coming."
And that's the end of the fight! Not the end of the sequence, but I've gone on long enough about this. Let's review really quickly what we can learn from this:
Good writing always does at least two things at once. Whether it's revealing character and plot, exposition and conflict, or world and backstory, every story beat should do this.
Alternate between moments of tension and release. When you add a new moment of tension, be sure it's an escalation of stakes.
Don't hit the same beat twice (and you can avoid doing this by following step 2).
Exposition and dialogue should always be revealed naturally and make sense in terms of character and world.
Every character deserves a moment to shine – don't let everything fall on the bad guy and the hero. The supporting cast should get their moments too. (Incidentally, the finally football match in Ted Lasso's first season does this really well too. Though not a traditional fight scene, it's a battle none the less. Go check it out!)
Structure a fight like you'd structure a story. Have a set up, a main confrontation, a low point, a climax, etc. +
Alright, that's enough on this. I hope you learned something and go check Fullmetal Alchemist out! For more information about writing fight scenes, check out these resources:
Lessons from the Screenplay: A Few Good Men — Writing a Final Battle
Nerdwriter: Helm's Deep — How to Film an Epic Battle
Stephan Krosecz: Pirates of the Caribbean - Accidentally Genius (start around the 12.30 minute mark if you only want the stuff on fight scenes)
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